21 year old cynic. Worthless, careless, and selfish.

 

theboykingandhisknight:

qabriel:

wow sammy looks really sad here.

image

don’t be sad

image

that’s better.

That’s horrifying

A lot of my friends ask to touch my head. I just stand there and get stroked for five minutes. It’s a free massage.

(Source: kirstendusnt)

*eats you out as a friend*

chiefsimba:

iknownothingisalliknow:

revitiligo:

thepoetspace:

amerikkkanpie:

Blows your back out as your homie

Gotchu walkin funny as a testament to our friendship.

makes you cum in the spirit of comradery

Got ur legs on my shoulders to show u how deep our friendship is

hits it from the back to let you know im here for you

(Source: aterriblehusband)

donutsornonuts:

We are gathered here today because SOMEBODY *glares at coffin* couldn’t stay alive.

dominospizzadelivery:

"Hey can u check if that milk went bad?"

*opens fridge*

*milk has leather jacket on smoking a cigarette*

"It’s bad alright"

konpozaa:

lifebien:

konpozaa:

this could be us but u a video game character

Doesn’t that make YOU the one that’s playin

Shit. shit. It was ME playin all along. Dammit